WHO IS UNCLE CHUCKIE?
His Serene Wisdom, Charles W. Cosimano, Master of Psionics, Archmagus and Troublemaker to the Gods, was born on 25, August, 1949, at 10:35 PM in Chicago, Illinois, USA. (WARNING!!! CASTING HIS HOROSCOPE IS VERY DANGEROUS. THE LAST PERSON WHO DID IT GAVE BIRTH TO TWINS AND HE WAS NOT EVEN PREGNANT!)
It is said that at the moment of his birth, a cry went up across the world "Mrs. O'leary! Where are you when we need you?"
Several prodigies were attendant upon his birth. Five politicians became honest, an eagle deposited something disgusting on the head of a park ranger in Wyoming and various undefined and embarrassing signs were seen in the heavens. It is said that seven wise men from the east came to the hospital bringing gifts of dried leaves and vacuum tubes.
As he grew to manhood, his honest, hard-working parents often expressed despair that their son was obviously not going to be either and were equally amazed by the fact that people who did not like him became terribly accident prone.
Our hero at ten
His first recorded act of magick took place when he was twelve and discovered that he could remove people by writing a death warrant for them. He also experiment with a small GSR and learned that he could give himself a fever to take a day off of school whenever he wanted to.
From these humble beginnings he went on to learn how to use a pendulum and met his teacher who taught him magick in the manner of the Vril Society, the teacher having been a member of that organization in his youth.
He continued in the ways of magick until April 7, 1977, when he built his first radionic box. The results were immediate. His girlfriend left him, he went nuts and ultimately joined the Theosophical Society, as he had already broken all the Christian commandments so many times that he needed new ones to break.
In the early 1980's he invented the now infamous Psionic Amplifying Helmet and directed his energies to perfecting his instruments and techiques and engaging in psychic combat with the Soviets. He is reputed to have been instrumental in the Chernobyl explosion, a statement he neither confirms nor denies, placing the energy from the battlefield of Verdun on the city of Basra during the Iran-Iraq war and even giving Saddam Hussein the idea of using poison gas during that war. Of course he neither confirms nor denies any of these rumors as well.
With the publication of Psionics 101, later retitled Psychic Power (now Elementary Psionics), he immediately became known as the Peck's Bad Boy of the New Age, notorious for his refusal to follow the rules and his aggressive political incorrectness. When asked once if he worried about his work falling into the "wrong hands," he replied, "Nah, the wrong hands wrote the book." He has since gone on to write Psionic Power (out of print but being redone as an e-book), Psionic Combat, Psionic Gadgets, Psionic Magick and The Psionic Path (all available as e-books).
In addition to his work in the area of psionics and magick, Charles Cosimano spent a number of years as a senior board member of the now defunct Chicagoland Discussion Group, an organization dedicated to the support of those practicing S/M in the Chicago area and maintains his position as a somewhat bored elder statesman in the Chicago Scene, his favorite quote on the subject being, "If I never sit through another meeting I will die a happy man!"
Oh, and one other thing. In May of 1999 he married his first and only wife Donna, and they are now living happily ever after in some mysterious location where he can look down upon his neighbors and send forth the waves of chaos that he so enjoys.
The Honored and Divine maternal Ancestors, Daniel and Nellie Waldron.
Daniel Waldron fought with General Sherman in the Civil War during which he visited Atlanta and learned the arts of arson and horse-thievery, After the war he parlayed those skills into becoming a very successful used horse trader.